At first, when the fingertip touched his lips, there wasn’t really much sensation because their body temperatures were the same.

It was only when Xie Yu gently pressed down with his fingertip that he felt the softness again.

The sleeping Lin Jianyuan’s warm, damp breaths brushed lightly over his finger.

Like a secluded little nest. Warm and moist.

Xie Yu kept thinking back to all the different replies in the comment section of that Little Red Book post.

He didn’t understand most of them at the time. Back then, he didn’t understand.

But now... he felt like maybe he understood a little.

With his fingertip, Xie Yu slowly explored Lin Jianyuan’s lips.

The lips themselves were soft, but once he crossed a certain boundary, they became wet.

That was the oral mucosa. Its texture felt completely different from the lips. It was softer and wetter.

Xie Yu had mucous membranes lining his own digestive tract too, but this was different.

Xie Yu never used a “hand” to touch the lining of his own digestive tract, and even if he really used one, he would still think it felt different.

He didn’t know why. It was just different.

Maybe because... Lin Jianyuan’s body was hotter?

There was a kind of warm, toasty feeling to Lin Jianyuan’s body.

Xie Yu thought that if he pushed his finger in a little farther, it would probably get even hotter.

The mouth was only the entrance to the digestive tract.

His fingertip moved like a tiny snake, delicately exploring farther into the mouth. It soon encountered another little snake inside that warm, wet nest.

The other little snake was asleep.

Dumb and sleepy.

If he poked its head, it would lift itself up, then slide back down off his fingertip again.

So soft. So hot.

It made Xie Yu instinctively move more gently. He even wanted to inspect his finger again.

He was afraid his nail might not have been trimmed cleanly and could hurt it.

...Huh. Trim... nails.

Xie Yu never thought about this before. He only watched Lin Jianyuan trim his nails.

No matter how long or short they were, Lin Jianyuan trimmed them regularly once a week.

It seemed like after they got together, Lin Jianyuan paid more and more attention to things like that.

Keeping himself clean and neat. Making himself smell nice.

Xie Yu suddenly realized...

Ah. Should I trim my nails regularly too?

Do my nails grow? They probably do, right?

If my nails grow, then we can trim our nails together every week. Then I’ll just let my nails grow long.

The more Xie Yu thought about it, the more he started smiling.

The little sleeping snake across from him slid off his fingertip again.

Ah. It fell off again.

Xie Yu teased it for a little while. Then, worried it might get tired, he let it go.

The little snake settled back into its original position and obediently continued sleeping.

Xie Yu continued forward too.

He pushed farther in, until his knuckle caught against Lin Jianyuan’s teeth.

After all, Lin Jianyuan’s mouth was only slightly open. It wasn’t exactly in a state prepared for exploration.

Xie Yu instinctively wanted to use his duodenum to pinch his cheeks.

Then suddenly thought...

Maybe he didn’t need to? Human fingers had lots of functions, especially the thumb.

Mm. Maybe... like this?

Xie Yu adjusted his angle.

He used his thumb and middle finger to pinch Lin Jianyuan’s cheeks from either side.

Through the flesh of his cheeks, he could feel his slightly parted jaws.

Then he applied pressure, but not too hard.

Too hard seemed like it might hurt.

Just a little. Just a tiny bit of force.

And Lin Jianyuan’s teeth opened like a clam shell.

Luckily, Xie Yu’s index finger was long enough.

Even with his thumb and middle finger staying outside, his index finger could still reach very deep.

He continued forward.

His knuckle slipped easily past the barrier of the teeth, and his fingertip touched the deeper oral mucosa.

“Mmph...” Lin Jianyuan seemed uncomfortable.

His handsome brows drew together slightly, then his Adam’s apple bobbed.

Xie Yu froze.

It felt like the lining of Lin Jianyuan’s throat squeezed around his fingertip.

That sensation of pressure instantly reminded him of eating. It was the same when he ate.

The throat squeezed and pushed food downward as it swallowed.

So this was what it felt like... for food to “be eaten”?

How strange. How interesting.

Xie Yu concentrated and continued farther down.

The sleeping Lin Jianyuan seemed to start eating him too. His pliant throat moved again and again.

Swallowing. Squeezing.

But Xie Yu’s finger wasn’t food, so his index finger remained there in Lin Jianyuan’s throat.

In the softest, hottest, wettest place.

Still asleep, Lin Jianyuan swallowed uselessly again and again.

Other than wetting Xie Yu’s fingertip with saliva and repeatedly squeezing it with the soft walls of his throat, there was nothing else he could do.

He could only frown miserably, and he looked so aggrieved.

So strange. So... special.

So this was what being eaten felt like?

“Mmph...” Lin Jianyuan’s throat moved over and over, swallowing who knew how many times in vain.

His brows furrowed tighter and tighter.

Ah. He really did look uncomfortable.

Uncomfortable enough that he was about to wake up.

Xie Yu quickly pulled out, afraid of disturbing his sleep.

Sure enough, the moment the finger came out, Lin Jianyuan’s tightly knitted brows slowly relaxed.

His breathing became even again, and only his mouth was still open. As if the poke made him stupid.

So dumb. So cute. And so well-behaved.

So, so well-behaved.

Xie Yu’s index finger was covered in saliva.

Wet and glossy.

It looked exactly like the way Lin Jianyuan’s Adam’s apple used to look after Xie Yu sucked on it.

Xie Yu put his finger back in again.

This time, Lin Jianyuan seemed slightly more accustomed to it, though his brows still drew together faintly.

Oh... Something was pushing him.

The little snake across from him woke up and weakly pushed against him with its body.

Xie Yu found it fascinating. He bent his knuckle and let the little snake shove at him.

Lin Jianyuan was dumb, and the little snake in his mouth was dumb too.

Neither had any strength. It only pushed at him softly, while its tip seemed to be licking him.

Sticky. Wet. With faint little sounds of moisture.

So cute. So... what did it feel like when the whole thing went in?

Xie Yu withdrew his index finger again.

From fingertip to base, the entire finger was wet, but it still wasn’t long enough.

On a human hand, the longest finger was the middle finger.

Xie Yu thought for a moment, then adjusted his position again. This time, he switched to his middle finger.

The next morning.

As usual, Lin Jianyuan stuffed all the little toys into his trouser pockets and took them out with him.

“I-I think yesterday I...” Socially Anxious Lego whispered, trembling as it addressed its seniors, “saw something I wasn’t supposed to see...”

Squishy said, “That’s normal.”

Socially Anxious Lego: “Huh? Really?! QAQ”

Squishy: “It was the Queen and the King’s nighttime little game, right? Normal. Those two do that every day.”

Socially Anxious Lego: “E-Every day?!”

Help! Did they seriously have to do it every day?!

Couldn’t they put it in the baby room too? Why did they have to leave it alone in the bedroom?!

It really thought their nighttime games were way too erotic!

Way too indecent!!!

Help!!!

Could you two lovebirds please consider the survival of the socially anxious lego when you play your games?!!!

...

When Lin Jianyuan woke up that morning, his mouth felt a little dry.

But after he gulped down a glass of water and drank the warm milk his wife lovingly prepared for him, the dryness went away.

Maybe he accidentally slept with his mouth open.

“By the way, do I snore?” Lin Jianyuan suddenly asked when they teleported to the Bureau.

His roommate said, “No.”

Lin Jianyuan: “Oh, good.”

His roommate: “Why?”

Lin Jianyuan: “I was worried I might disturb your sleep. It’s fine. If I ever snore, just wake me up.”

The corners of his roommate’s mouth curved upward.

“What if I can’t wake you? You sleep so deeply. I can put my hand in your mouth, and you still won’t wake up.”

Lin Jianyuan said, “Then kick me. Tickle me. If that still doesn’t work, pinch my nose. I’ll definitely wake up if you pinch my nose.”

“Oh, I see.”

His roommate laughed softly. “I’ll remember that.”

Lin Jianyuan smiled too and reached out to pinch his roommate’s gallbladder.

Shi Shaoning, who happened to be passing by at that exact moment: “...”

Disgusting dog-man-and-intestine couple!

Shi Shaoning originally planned to speed-walk past at the speed of light.

Unfortunately, even while terminally lovestruck, Lin Jianyuan still had eyes and ears everywhere.

“Captain Shi!” Lin Jianyuan greeted him cheerfully. “Morning! Why are you so...”

Shi Shaoning said expressionlessly, “Pulled an all-nighter.”

Lin Jianyuan noticed the dark circles under his eyes and couldn’t help feeling sympathetic. “Remember to take your meds.”

“Took them. Oh, right. That little card of yours,” Shi Shaoning said. “I forgot to bring it.”

Lin Jianyuan said, “It’s fine. No rush. That girl was very considerate. She knew you were busy, so she was the one who said there was no hurry.”

The corner of Shi Shaoning’s mouth twitched upward almost imperceptibly.

Then, still acting cool, he said, “I’ve been busy these past few days. I’m worried I’ll forget. To save you the trouble, just take a picture of me.”

Lin Jianyuan took out his phone.

“That works. I can just take some exclusive photos and send them to her... Wait, no. What about the autograph? I promised her an autograph too. A digital signature won’t do, right? That completely ruins the sense of occasion.”

...

Since yesterday, Feng Le’er couldn’t stop checking her phone even though she turned both the vibration and volume all the way up.

She was absolutely certain that if any new message came in, she would be notified, but she still couldn’t stop looking.

Lighting up the screen over and over to see if there was anything new.

Opening WeChat repeatedly to see if the notifications were somehow delayed.

Opening that pinned chat again and again to see whether she somehow went insane, lost her memory, and missed a message.

But apart from the original system message: You have added Abyss. You can now start chatting. The two of them didn’t exchange a single message.

There wasn’t even a WeChat transfer.

Once Feng Le’er calmed down from her initial excitement, unease gradually began to creep in.

Could he actually be... a scammer?

Could that guy actually be some lunatic or violent psycho?

Could he have deliberately smashed my phone, then lied about compensating me and lied about knowing Shi Shaoning...?

Feng Le’er’s heart sank, but then she thought about it again.

If he were a scammer, why would he take the initiative to add her on WeChat?!

And besides, well... he really was pretty handsome.

At least 185 centimeters tall. Lean, lightly muscled build.

He wasn’t exactly a fresh-faced young idol anymore, but if he went on Little Red Book and posted some thirst-trap videos, he could probably still go viral.

Feng Le’er: “...” Aaaaah stop stop stop! He might actually be a scammer!

Who said handsome people couldn’t be scammers?!!!

Maybe that face was literally how he scammed people!!!

But apart from her phone getting smashed, it didn’t seem like she actually lost anything else... So why was there still no word from him?

Feng Le’er almost couldn't resist asking, but yesterday, she herself was the one who said, “Shi Shaoning must be really busy filming. There’s no rush, no rush.”

What if the guy wasn’t a scammer? What if it was actually all real?

If she asked now, wouldn’t he think she was annoying?! Then he would definitely know she didn’t trust him!

Aaaaaah! This is torture!

Feng Le’er rubbed her face in frustration.

Just then, Ding-dong!

Her phone rang, and it was a WeChat notification!

Feng Le’er was so nervous that her fingers trembled slightly.

Taking deep breaths, she opened WeChat. But what appeared in the chat wasn’t a money transfer or a photo.

It was a text message.

Abyss: “May I ask your name?”

Feng Le’er’s heart sank again as her brain started running at top speed.

Is he a scammer or not? Why does he want my name?

Is it risky to give my name to a stranger like this...?

Then she suddenly thought of another possibility.

Oh, right! For large transfers, don’t you have to enter the recipient’s real name?

Feng Le’er hesitated over and over. In the end, she gritted her teeth and typed her name into the chat box.

Send.

Pressing Send felt like placing a bet.

Feng Le’er waited nervously for a long time. During that time, she couldn’t do anything else.

Her heart pounded wildly, yet after who knew how long, what arrived wasn’t a red packet or a transfer.

It was... a voice message?

Feng Le’er’s heart kept sinking.

By then, she was almost certain she was dealing with a scammer...

But she still tapped the voice message as if opening a court verdict.

“Hello, Feng Le’er.”

The other person immediately called her by name.

But that voice... Why didn’t it sound much like the guy who smashed her phone?

Why did it sound like... Like...?!

Feng Le’er’s heart started hammering wildly as the voice message continued.

“I’m Shi Shaoning.”

Ah!

AAAAAAH!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

Fireworks started detonating nonstop inside Feng Le’er’s brain!

Shi Shaoning!

That really was Shi Shaoning’s voice!!!

It was Shi Shaoning!!!

My fave sent me a voice message!!!

My fave said my name and sent me a voice message AAAAAAAAAAH!!!

The actual content was nothing more than a celebrity greeting a fan and thanking her for supporting him.

But he said her name! It was a personalized voice message!!!

Feng Le’er was already knocked senseless by happiness.

Then, in the very next second, reality hit her with an even bigger surprise.

Aybss: [Image] [Image] [Image]

Aybss: Voice message (6s)

The pictures were selfies of Shi Shaoning. Brand-new material, and all of it was new to her.

With trembling hands, Feng Le’er opened the voice message. Sure enough, she heard her fave’s voice again.

“Work makes this a little inconvenient, so I had to hide in the restroom to take them. Hope you don’t mind.”

Feng Le’er: !!!

He took them on the spot while hiding in the restroom?! He took them right then?! He specifically took them just for her?!

AAAAAAH!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

Feng Le’er transformed into a screaming chicken, spinning in circles on the spot and mentally throwing flower petals everywhere.

Ding-dong.

Ding-dong.

Ding-dong.

More photos floated into the chat like they cost nothing.

Feng Le’er clutched her chest and frantically saved every original-resolution image.

At this point she already felt like she could die with no regrets!!! But somehow the surprises still weren’t over!

Ding-dong.

She received a transfer, and the amount was...

30,000.

Feng Le’er’s eyes widened. She could hardly believe it and immediately replied,

“What is this? You don’t need to give me this much!”

Abyss: “I checked the official price of your phone model. I didn’t know the specifications, so I calculated it based on the highest configuration.”

Abyss: “I wasn’t sure what model your tripod was either, so I added an estimate and rounded everything off. If it isn’t enough, let me know. Sorry.”

Feng Le’er: “…………………………”

She couldn’t take this anymore.

First he smashed her with personalized voice messages from her fave and exclusive content. Now he was smashing her with a huge amount of money too?!

What was he doing?! Was he trying to kill her?!!!

Feng Le’er tearfully accepted the transfer, then she sent part of it back.

Her phone wasn’t the highest-spec version after all, and the tripod wasn’t worth that much either.

Ding-dong.

Ding-dong ding-dong ding-dong.

Over at the Bureau, Lin Jianyuan’s phone started going crazy too.

He received several reaction stickers in a row, and all of them involved screaming, spinning, throwing flowers, and giving thanks.

It was obvious that the girl completely forgave him.

Lin Jianyuan sighed.

“That’s why you need to pay attention to your methods when you do things,” Shi Shaoning said coldly. “Don’t get into the habit of solving problems with violence. This time, you bought someone’s forgiveness with money. What about next time?”

“Got it, got it.” Lin Jianyuan grinned and began massaging Shi Shaoning’s shoulders.

“Captain Shi worked so hard! Captain Shi is a righteous hero! Captain Shi, you’re the number-one kindhearted, gorgeous, insanely handsome man in the whole world! Thank you, Captain Shi, for wiping my ass!”

Shi Shaoning: “...”

Shi Shaoning gave a small hmph and calmly accepted Lin Jianyuan’s flattery as his rightful due.

“Oh, right.” Shi Shaoning suddenly remembered something. “Did you ever go back to the reform zone? Now that you’ve been promoted to A-class, you can go pick out a few more little followers.”

Lin Jianyuan: “...”

Shi Shaoning instantly exploded.

“DON’T MAKE THAT BORED-AS-HELL FACE!”

“Ah, okay.”

Lin Jianyuan scratched his head. “Got it. Thanks for the reminder, Captain Shi. I’ll go.”

They finished shooting the restroom fashion editorial, and then the mobile terminal suddenly rang again.

Shi Shaoning already had PTSD.

The moment he heard the terminal’s communication alert, he opened his mouth, ready to start cursing someone.

But Lin Jianyuan raised a hand to stop him and motioned for him to calm down.

“It’s not yours. It’s mine,” Lin Jianyuan said. “You should hurry back. If you can clock out, clock out immediately. Otherwise, the second you stay at the office, another job will fall into your lap, and you’ll never get to leave.”

Shi Shaoning wore the expression of a man who was already dead.

“I verified that fact ten thousand times already. Do I need you to teach me?”

Lin Jianyuan burst out laughing, and the two parted ways outside the restroom.

Lin Jianyuan picked up the terminal and answered, “Hello, Director...”

The moment Shi Shaoning heard the word “Director,” he immediately greased the soles of his feet and fled at top speed.

But no one could have expected that the director, who normally loved long preambles, wouldn’t bother with one this time.

He immediately spilled everything in one breath:

“Lin Jianyuan! Get to the Containment Department now! A new hire accidentally broke your bronze circuit! Your wife tried to fix it and knocked out the power to the entire Containment Department! All Aberrants below S-class broke out at once! Your wife is eating like crazy! He’s about to eat until he throws up! He’s about to go berserk!”

Lin Jianyuan: “...”

The director shouted, “LIN JIANYUAN! HURRY!!!”